The right place?

I am having a slightly tough week.  Or maybe really tough.  My brain is totally weighed down.  I feel stressed, but the type of stressed where I want to sleep, zone out, be a hermit.  I hope that doesn't sound like being depressed. I hope I'm not depressed.  That would be depressing.

There's no one singular reason for my general lack of well-being right now - it's probably a mix of lots of things.  Men are like waffles (they can compartmentalize into small boxes, nothing affecting anything else), women are like spaghetti (everything is tied together in one large hunk of issues)...

But I think the root of my problem is that I don't feel like I am in the right PLACE.  I've known for years that Atlanta isn't the most fitting city for me/us, but I've always been willing to accept and make the best of our time here for now.  

Then, I was recently offered the opportunity for promotion/advancement within my company.  The promotion involves a 2012 move to Jacksonville, Florida.  I have been considering the position and the logistics of moving for a couple of weeks now...and the more I think about it, the less I want to go.  I have zero desire to be in Jacksonville.  I enjoy the occasional day on the beach, but I am learning I am really not a beach person, or even a pool person - not on an everyday basis, anyway.  I like cities.  I like villages.  I like greenery and gardens and parks set in the middle of walkable areas.  I like history, and life happening around me, but having a haven in the middle of all that life.

I am having a hard time reconciling my desire to make more money with my desire to NOT live in Jacksonville (for a variety of reasons - commute, the city itself, the office environment there, etc.).  By complete chance, I just won and received a book from GoodReads - a book called "A Real Life" - a book about the fact that our lives have become centered on money and things instead of real happiness - peace, rest, intellectual stimulation, friends, etc.  It couldn't have come at a more fitting time - the one time I am heavily debating lifestyle preferences vs. money and career advancement.

So, we (myself and Wes) are traveling to Jacksonville this weekend to check out the area and discuss the position with the Jacksonville team.  But my gut tells me it's just not right.

However - my general feelings of discontent right now go deeper than this job question.  My gut tells me we're not in the right place at all.  I don't know where the right place is.  I am only truly drawn to (A) Europe or (B) colonial cities in the US.  I am not sure my husband is drawn to either, while my heart is literally crying out to go.  I dream about being elsewhere. I consider totally beginning again in a new place with a bookstore job, or a receptionist position, or something equally small.  Simply being in the right environment seems like utter bliss to me.  My heart says that if I could get to the truly right place for us, I could be so content outside of money or career, and inside the things that really matter - the quiet moments, the friendships we develop, the time spent just enjoying the world with my husband.

At the same time, my brain tells me there's a lot to consider about moving to a new city or a new country.  

Heart or head?  Heart or head?  My feelings have evolved from feeling like we'd simply FIT better in another place, to really feeling like we're not in the right place now.  I am just struggling with how to address the issue.